From the Mouth of Babes, or Another Weekend With the Boys

I spent more time hanging out with Mr. Curls and the boys this weekend. It surprises me how quickly the four of us have slipped into a comfortable zone. The boys have totally taken me in stride and I liked them from the outset. E., the younger boy, has basically adopted me wholesale. On Sunday, we took two cars to the park and frozen yogurt shop because I was leaving directly from there to meet some friends for dinner. Before we left the apartment, E. heard this and promptly told Mr. Curls, "A. can go with you, and I'll go with Jean." Just like that, I had a co-pilot.

Mr. Curls got a bit uncomfortable with his son proclaiming he'd ride with me without asking me first. Mr. Curls told E. that it was up to me whether or not that would be the case. For my part, I didn't mind and I took it as a stamp of approval that E. volunteered himself to ride with me.

E. also dropped a nugget of info over blueberry pancakes at breakfast. A. made the comment that he, Mr. Curls, and I were all oldest siblings, which made E. the odd man out. E. proceeded to tell me that he used to be the middle kid when he had a step mom. Turns out, ex #2 had a two-year-old daughter. It fits what little I know about her, and especially what I know about Mr. Curls. The toddler, meaning she got pregnant either at the tail end of 17 or the beginning of being 18, makes sense. She wasn't the paragon of virtue (I'm not generalizing here, but making a specific statement about this particular gal) and it fits that she was a teen mom. It also fits that Mr. Curls would see that, connect it to his own early fatherhood, and see a connection with her. Also, it makes a little more sense that he would get so tied with this gal so quickly, because he might have been looking at it not only as taking care of this chic, but also as taking care of her kid. Kids are a definite soft spot for him, especially since his access to his boys is so limited (their mom moved an hour and a half away after the divorce).

When E. talked about the ex, it was an interesting moment. Mr. Curls was certainly watching my reaction since the two-year-old was part of the bank of non-essential information we'd talked about me learning at a later date. So, it's not like he was keeping a secret, per se, but E. was telling me something Mr. Curls hadn't. Mr. Curls watched me.

E. watched me too. He's a kid who's got little by way of filter between what he thinks and what he says, but I sensed a tiny bit of purpose behind the comment. I'm not sure what that purpose might have been, but something in what he said was about me, because he watched me pretty closely, waiting for a response instead of talking on. From the tone and his attitude, I lean toward thinking that his comment about having had a step mom before was a little bit aimed toward hinting that it'd be okay if he had a step mom again. Or, maybe I'm reading too much into it. Either way, after I said a neutral, "Oh yeah?" the moment passed.

(Side Note: Mr. Curls haven't talked about the revelation yet. He hasn't brought it up, and I wanted to wait for the right moment. It's not something I'm worried about, really, and it's not something where I'm upset with him for not telling me. The conversations we've had about the exes have been pretty clear on the part where I don't want all the details at once and the part where he's got more to tell than I know so far. I made it clear that if there was anything that'd directly affect me, I wanted to know now, and I trust him that the unknown parts are okay to be unknown right now. The ex's kid info is important, but it doesn't directly affect me, so I'm okay that he hadn't told me that part yet.)

After breakfast, we bummed around a bit until I suggested we go to the park to let the boys get some fresh air. Mr. Curls smiled. "It's interesting how you said 'we' like it was the most natural thing in the world." E. jumped on the idea, proclaiming it'd be "romantic" for me and Mr. Curls. He was less impressed when, at the park, Mr. Curls declined to play tag because of his back - it's better, but not yet 100%. Both of the boys gave him a hard time about being a wuss, but Mr. Curls held firm and the boys decided they were over this whole park thing and it was time for frozen yogurt.

Later, at the yogurt shop, I went to the ladies room to wash my hands after I finished my dessert and stood at the sink next to a young lady who worked there. She smiled at me and said, "My friend and I were talking about you and your husband. We think you're so cute together."

I debated with myself for a moment whether or not to correct the misunderstanding, then I just said, "Thanks." I wonder if the assumption also followed that I was the boys' mom. It's interesting to think about.

The whole situation with Mr. Curls' complicated past and the boys' complicated parental situation is, well, complicated, and now I'm plopped in the middle of it. I'm cautious about the whole thing, because there's so much potential for drama, but so far things have gone along with remarkable smoothness. It's unexpected and leaves me wondering, why isn't it harder? Is this too easy? That part makes me a little nervous.