I got the web cam job, which is cool. Since the gal who hired me is two hours away, I'm doing all the new hire stuff remotely, which is less cool and more of a pain in the ass. One of the most fun things included in the process was the drug test, which I did today.
I arrived at the drug test place at 2:00. Since it was a pee test, I'd come ready to go. Then I signed in and waited. Then I waited some more. Then I started to shift in my seat uncomfortably. At that point, it was about 2:30. I tried to ignore the pressure in my bladder. I tried to focus on the book I brought with me. 2:45.
Finally, the gal who signed in right before me got called up. The gal came out of the room and I got ready for my turn. The nurse called up someone else, a gal who needed a blood test. I started to wonder how long it would take before my bladder exploded or I wet myself. Finally, at 3:00, it was my turn. I've never been so excited to be handed a sample cup.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
Interviewing online
I had my web cam interview yesterday and, believe it or not, I didn't die. I think it went okay, in fact. The gal I talked to is making the decision quick, so I should know by tomorrow whether or not I got the job. Part of me wants the job, part of me wouldn't mind not getting it. Either way, it's out of my hands for now.
Today I have to write a "letter of interest" which is terrible because a letter of interest is never what it sounds like. Why can't they just call it what it is - an application letter? I've got to write it in the next hour 'cause it's due at 5:00 and I've been putting it off all day. I hate these. They suck monkey balls. *Sigh.* Well, I'd better get it done. The only thing worse than having to write the damn thing would be not getting it in on time.
Today I have to write a "letter of interest" which is terrible because a letter of interest is never what it sounds like. Why can't they just call it what it is - an application letter? I've got to write it in the next hour 'cause it's due at 5:00 and I've been putting it off all day. I hate these. They suck monkey balls. *Sigh.* Well, I'd better get it done. The only thing worse than having to write the damn thing would be not getting it in on time.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Fear Response
This weekend I'm tense and panicked and feeling rather like I felt just before my first date with Army Guy. It's not quite abject terror, but it's kind of close.
In the past week or so I've been making moves to change things up. I put my name in to join a campus committee which could help me get a lecturer position if/when one opens up. The result of this is that I had to submit my CV to the current committee and I'll be having a formal interview on Thursday. Tomorrow is the CV deadline, but I had to do it today because I have other commitments tomorrow. As of a few minutes ago, the CV is off to committee Inboxes.
Also whizzing in cyberspace is a couple of e-mails I sent to friends/colleagues asking for letters of recommendation for this other academic program I'm applying for - a professional development shin dig that happens in the summer. My application for that is due November 13.
Last week, I put in an application for a couple of jobs. One, a seasonal gig, has set me up with a web cam interview later today.
Last week, I submitted a couple of short stories to a couple of magazines.
There it is: bam, bam, bam. I'm putting myself out there. I'm being judged. Of all of this, I've gotten one response so far, a magazine that rejected my story. Rejection sucks, and I've just lined myself up for a lot of it. All I can think of today is that I want to forget it all, pretend none of it exists.
Forefront in my mind is a conversation I had with Amanda a long time ago, about being in a rut, about needing a change. Change can be good. It can also be terrifying, especially when that change relies on someone else. Will any of them like me? Will all of them reject me? Why can't I just hide under my covers?
In the past week or so I've been making moves to change things up. I put my name in to join a campus committee which could help me get a lecturer position if/when one opens up. The result of this is that I had to submit my CV to the current committee and I'll be having a formal interview on Thursday. Tomorrow is the CV deadline, but I had to do it today because I have other commitments tomorrow. As of a few minutes ago, the CV is off to committee Inboxes.
Also whizzing in cyberspace is a couple of e-mails I sent to friends/colleagues asking for letters of recommendation for this other academic program I'm applying for - a professional development shin dig that happens in the summer. My application for that is due November 13.
Last week, I put in an application for a couple of jobs. One, a seasonal gig, has set me up with a web cam interview later today.
Last week, I submitted a couple of short stories to a couple of magazines.
There it is: bam, bam, bam. I'm putting myself out there. I'm being judged. Of all of this, I've gotten one response so far, a magazine that rejected my story. Rejection sucks, and I've just lined myself up for a lot of it. All I can think of today is that I want to forget it all, pretend none of it exists.
Forefront in my mind is a conversation I had with Amanda a long time ago, about being in a rut, about needing a change. Change can be good. It can also be terrifying, especially when that change relies on someone else. Will any of them like me? Will all of them reject me? Why can't I just hide under my covers?
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
F*ing Dog
This morning started at 6:00. I put the dog outside and staggered back to my bedroom to pick out what to wear for the day. Then I heard my dog barking like a maniac. What the hell?
I went to investigate and opened the back door to find
1. my dog standing by the fence, barking like a maniac
2. the neighborhood skunk just on the other side of the fence, looking pissed
3. a pungent aroma in the air.
This morning, by 6:02, while I was still half-asleep, I got wrestle my dog into the bathtub and frantically scrub her down. Oh, it was delightful. All the while, my dog was all bewildered and giving me those eyes like, "but mom, why are you being so mean to me?"
Good news: I was able to scrub my dog well enough that she smells almost entirely like shampoo and hardly like skunk at all.
Bad news: All that dog washing in my bathroom has made my bathroom, and, by extension, my house smell like skunk.
Worse news: This has made everything in my house smell like skunk, including the clothes I wore to campus today, which forced me to tell all of my students, "If something smells gross, it's me!"
Worst news: This morning started off cold and rainy. It has progressed to colder and snowy. There's no way I can air any of the skunk stink out.
So now I'm hiding out at home, too afraid to go anywhere 'cause I know I'm saturated with skunk smell. Delightful.
I went to investigate and opened the back door to find
1. my dog standing by the fence, barking like a maniac
2. the neighborhood skunk just on the other side of the fence, looking pissed
3. a pungent aroma in the air.
This morning, by 6:02, while I was still half-asleep, I got wrestle my dog into the bathtub and frantically scrub her down. Oh, it was delightful. All the while, my dog was all bewildered and giving me those eyes like, "but mom, why are you being so mean to me?"
Good news: I was able to scrub my dog well enough that she smells almost entirely like shampoo and hardly like skunk at all.
Bad news: All that dog washing in my bathroom has made my bathroom, and, by extension, my house smell like skunk.
Worse news: This has made everything in my house smell like skunk, including the clothes I wore to campus today, which forced me to tell all of my students, "If something smells gross, it's me!"
Worst news: This morning started off cold and rainy. It has progressed to colder and snowy. There's no way I can air any of the skunk stink out.
So now I'm hiding out at home, too afraid to go anywhere 'cause I know I'm saturated with skunk smell. Delightful.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Fat Pants!
I got to spend some time with my brother on Sunday and catch up with how things have been going for him off in Florida land. During the conversation, he proudly announced the following:
Brother: I bought new pants today!
Me: Oh my, that's big news for you.
Brother: I had to. I've put on fifteen pounds since May.
(He had a big grin when he said it)
Me: I'm so... pleased for you?
Brother: It might have something to do with the fact that I have a whole mini-fridge devoted to beer.
Me: It just might.
Brother: Now I have fat pants!
I'm trying to think of any woman I've ever know who has been so entertained by weight gain. I'm drawing a blank. My brother, though, he thinks it's hilarious.
Brother: I bought new pants today!
Me: Oh my, that's big news for you.
Brother: I had to. I've put on fifteen pounds since May.
(He had a big grin when he said it)
Me: I'm so... pleased for you?
Brother: It might have something to do with the fact that I have a whole mini-fridge devoted to beer.
Me: It just might.
Brother: Now I have fat pants!
I'm trying to think of any woman I've ever know who has been so entertained by weight gain. I'm drawing a blank. My brother, though, he thinks it's hilarious.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Ice Dancer
Between last night and this morning, we've been having fog and freezing rain. Summer is officially over. My flowers are dying beautiful deaths.
Friday, October 9, 2009
A WTF? Moment
Driving on campus today, I came to a stop sign and saw the car in the other lane had its hazard lights on. I looked over.
A woman in her late forties was standing next to a tree a few feet away from her parked car. Her six-year-old son/grandson stood beside her, facing the tree, with his pants pulled down. Yes, ladies and gentleman, he was taking a whiz on the campus lawn right next to the math building.
Clearly, the idea of going inside the building to use an actual toilet was just stupid.
A woman in her late forties was standing next to a tree a few feet away from her parked car. Her six-year-old son/grandson stood beside her, facing the tree, with his pants pulled down. Yes, ladies and gentleman, he was taking a whiz on the campus lawn right next to the math building.
Clearly, the idea of going inside the building to use an actual toilet was just stupid.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Between the Boys: Part 2
*If you haven't read Part 1 yet, read it before you read this post.*
Later on, I tell the story of what happened to my parents. My mom says, "And you just got in between them like that?"
"Yeah. I had to."
Mom doesn't look thrilled. In fact, she looks worried. "That could have been dangerous. In the heat of the moment like that, who knows what could have happened." She reminds me that there was no way for me to know if one of them, for instance, had a knife.
Then I realize, during the whole thing, it never once crossed my mind that I could get hurt. The only thing I was thinking was that I had to step in. I had to take control of the situation.
I acted on my gut. There were some different factors involved in why I did what I did, but I realize that a lot of it came from growing up a tom boy. Back then, I had to stare down plenty of boys that had something to prove. I became an expert at it.
It's a paradox - send me on a first date, and I'm terrified. Throw me into a situation like this, and I have complete confidence. Though, after the situation was de-escalated, my hands were a bit wobbly from the adrenaline rush.
Later on, I tell the story of what happened to my parents. My mom says, "And you just got in between them like that?"
"Yeah. I had to."
Mom doesn't look thrilled. In fact, she looks worried. "That could have been dangerous. In the heat of the moment like that, who knows what could have happened." She reminds me that there was no way for me to know if one of them, for instance, had a knife.
Then I realize, during the whole thing, it never once crossed my mind that I could get hurt. The only thing I was thinking was that I had to step in. I had to take control of the situation.
I acted on my gut. There were some different factors involved in why I did what I did, but I realize that a lot of it came from growing up a tom boy. Back then, I had to stare down plenty of boys that had something to prove. I became an expert at it.
It's a paradox - send me on a first date, and I'm terrified. Throw me into a situation like this, and I have complete confidence. Though, after the situation was de-escalated, my hands were a bit wobbly from the adrenaline rush.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Between the Boys: Part 1
Today while my class is working on their current projects, a commotion breaks out. I go over to see what's going on and two of my male students are pissed at each other. One has a big mouth that hides the vulnerable kid beneath, and the other has just had a rough time of it this semester, (i.e.: both have something to prove).
They aren't really talking by the time I get there, but their body language is full of anger. I ask them what's going on, but neither answers me. The whole class is gawking, waiting for things to get interesting. One student is throwing his things together and he starts walking out the door. The other follows. All I can think of is once they hit the hallway, there's going to be violence, so I'm right behind them and then it's the three of us in the empty hall, with the classroom door shut behind us.
The two guys square off in the hall. One of them isn't incredibly tall, (maybe 5' 7" ish), and one of them is over six foot and a football player who's, well, built like one. I step right in between them and, knowing, because I know these students, that if something's going to start, it's the bigger student who's going to start it, I turn to him and look him in the eye.
He ignores me for a few seconds, looking over my shoulder at the other student and visibly shaking with anger, but I keep talking in a calm voice, saying things like "Look at me, not at him, at me. We need to take this down a notch," and he finally meets my gaze, takes a breath, and calms down enough to walk back in the room. The other student goes to follow, and I stop him to make sure he's calm enough to go back in.
Both guys are back in the room, with all the rest of my class staring on, bug-eyed and holding their breath to see what's going to happen. I say, "Okay, gentlemen, you both need to sit down, and you," I call one by name, "need to move back a few rows and work with your group."
Their body language makes it clear they're half a second away from starting a fight right there in the classroom, so I add, because our campus security is actually a sheriff's office, "Now, gentleman, if I need to, I will call the sheriff. Do I need to make that call?"
One shakes his head. The other mutters, "No ma'am." Then, thankfully, they both sit down. The other students watch for a little longer, and one raises her hand with a question. I look at both of the boys and gauge the situation, then I turn my back to them and walk over to help her, tensed, all the while, in case things started up again.
Behind me, it stayed quiet.
They aren't really talking by the time I get there, but their body language is full of anger. I ask them what's going on, but neither answers me. The whole class is gawking, waiting for things to get interesting. One student is throwing his things together and he starts walking out the door. The other follows. All I can think of is once they hit the hallway, there's going to be violence, so I'm right behind them and then it's the three of us in the empty hall, with the classroom door shut behind us.
The two guys square off in the hall. One of them isn't incredibly tall, (maybe 5' 7" ish), and one of them is over six foot and a football player who's, well, built like one. I step right in between them and, knowing, because I know these students, that if something's going to start, it's the bigger student who's going to start it, I turn to him and look him in the eye.
He ignores me for a few seconds, looking over my shoulder at the other student and visibly shaking with anger, but I keep talking in a calm voice, saying things like "Look at me, not at him, at me. We need to take this down a notch," and he finally meets my gaze, takes a breath, and calms down enough to walk back in the room. The other student goes to follow, and I stop him to make sure he's calm enough to go back in.
Both guys are back in the room, with all the rest of my class staring on, bug-eyed and holding their breath to see what's going to happen. I say, "Okay, gentlemen, you both need to sit down, and you," I call one by name, "need to move back a few rows and work with your group."
Their body language makes it clear they're half a second away from starting a fight right there in the classroom, so I add, because our campus security is actually a sheriff's office, "Now, gentleman, if I need to, I will call the sheriff. Do I need to make that call?"
One shakes his head. The other mutters, "No ma'am." Then, thankfully, they both sit down. The other students watch for a little longer, and one raises her hand with a question. I look at both of the boys and gauge the situation, then I turn my back to them and walk over to help her, tensed, all the while, in case things started up again.
Behind me, it stayed quiet.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
The Moth and the Mailbox
One day a while back I found this little guy behind my mailbox. I grabbed my camera and caught him. I'm not much of a black & white photo person, but I'm thinking this'd make a good one.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Highlights from the week
- Phone message from Amanda: "I want to let you know, because I think you'll enjoy this, that I'm sitting in a Chinese restaurant in my little town in Arkansas and they're playing country music on the stereo."
- Hearing M. do Karaoke for her Bday ('cause that's what she likes) and finding out that she's got a fantastic voice. Side note: Mr. B. also came and she's still got a mad crush and he's still not interested.
- Did a health assessment with my new personal trainer which included us going into a private room, me taking off my shirt, and her measuring body parts. This prompted...
- Me remarking to Amanda that, "In the past four months I've been groped twice, both times by middle aged women." (One was my doctor, the other my trainer.) She was quick to offer a pep talk, "That'd be great if you were a lesbian."
- More e-mails with Navy guy in which I realize that, on paper, he just might be a great guy for me. There's just that small problem of him being in Italy and me being in the US. Logistics are a bitch.
- Took myself on a date to see Zombieland yesterday. It was wonderful. I'm pretty sure I was the only female there who hadn't gotten dragged to the movie by their boyfriend/husband. Apparently Zombie movies aren't chick flicks. Who knew?
Should He Be Worried?
Ah, Facebook, you are often entertaining, and sometimes disturbing, and today I'm more that second one.
My brother's girlfriend is freaking me out a bit. My brother's back in town for a while to do a part of his pilot training, and lemme tell you, the GF is way excited about this. So excited, she kept putting up statuses that went like this, "I get to see him in three hours" then, "I get to see him in two hours!" and so on. Yeesh, girlie, chill out.
But, the topper today, was when her status popped up as the following:
GF WANTS BABIES!!!!! hahaha
Uh, yeah, about that...
I've got to say, I'm a bit concerned.
My brother's girlfriend is freaking me out a bit. My brother's back in town for a while to do a part of his pilot training, and lemme tell you, the GF is way excited about this. So excited, she kept putting up statuses that went like this, "I get to see him in three hours" then, "I get to see him in two hours!" and so on. Yeesh, girlie, chill out.
But, the topper today, was when her status popped up as the following:
GF WANTS BABIES!!!!! hahaha
Uh, yeah, about that...
I've got to say, I'm a bit concerned.
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